Moving Along

I can't believe it's February already.  January went well.  (Happy face).  As mentioned in my previous post my daughter and I have been following a diet plan.  We both love it.  It's call the Fit Girls Guide and a link to their site is here.  The program is laid out so well!  It gives you shopping lists and recipes as well as instructions on what to prepare in advanced.  The book is written with a great sense of humor and wit and full of enthusiasm and positivity.  The food is all "clean" and delicious.  I'm not going to go into so much detail on the food because they are selling the book online and it just wouldn't be right to give the information away.  But I will say pizza, chocolate, tacos, yum!

I ended up losing five pounds over the month.  I would have done better if I had exercised more (well, if I exercised at all, ha ha) and didn't go to Disneyland twice.  And didn't have company to enjoy yummy meals with a couple times... oh well.  No regrets.  So overall I think January was a success. We are continuing with the Fit Girls Guide this month and enjoying the process.  If I can loose five pounds a month I will be very happy!

One of the biggest obstacles has been my daughters health.  I have written about it a few times in the past and it is a constant worry for me, of course.  She has GI (gastro-intestinal) problems which often causes her pain discomfort.  Eating for us is a way of feeling better, even if it is temporary.  Bread is always soothing to someone with acid reflux and it just tastes so yummy.  So we did have bread a few times when we weren't supposed to.  Also, finding foods that don't cause her discomfort is a constant learning process.  Eating high fiber veggies and grains is not always good for someone with intestinal issues.  The past week has been hard for her.  Her pain and discomfort were high and all she wanted to do was lie in bed.  Two trips to the doctor and an adjustment to her medicines seems to have helped.

I'm ready for some serious change in myself.  Now I have to make it happen.
Wish me luck!!!!

Karen

Here we go again!

Happy New Year!  It's been a long time since I wrote on this blog and I had pretty much given up on it.  But here I am at the start of a new year with renewed hope for myself.  I have such mixed emotions about losing weight now.  I don't really have faith in myself to be successful but I know I have to keep trying or things will only get worse.

Being over weight is a downward spiral.  You want to do things but you feel uncomfortable doing them.  Going for a walk now is difficult for me because I have bursitis and tendinosis  (small injury that never healed correctly).  Also, I feel like I will look ridiculous at my weight running or jumping or doing anything that requires special clothing.  A swimsuit is a scary thing!

However, I need to persevere.  That's going to be my word-of-the-year: persevere.  I need to keep trying and not give up on myself.  There are many obstacles and I need to work at dealing with them rather than letting them defeat me.

My daughter has definitely been my inspiration.  After undergoing two years of medical issues, last summer she decided to eat healthier and drop some of the weight she put on while she was feeling sick.  She lost over 20 pounds!  I'm so proud of her and impressed with her dedication.  She basically gave up bread and processed foods and worked out more.  She's a dancer and is at the dance studio about 15 hours a week so working out was not an obstacle for her.  I love you baby!

My daughter and I are going to start a diet monday.  I'll post more about that later and give the link to website we are using.  Meanwhile, I plan on cleaning out my pantry and getting rid of dangerous foods.  I also need to find ways to move my body more....  More to come!

Happy, healthy new year!

Karen

Frustrated

Frustration has set in and the scale is not cooperating.... I need to focus and take control.
UGH...

Weight update and more

First, a weigh-in update... I gained 2.2 pounds when I returned to Weight Watchers after the holidays on January 9th.  I was disappointed but not expecting anything different.  The next week I lost 2.2 and was ecstatic!  Then, the following week I had a one pound gain.  Ugh. I was so mad.  I felt terrible and I was very angry with myself.  I sat through the meeting sulking a bit and realizing that the few weeks during the holiday season had brought back old habits and they are hard to change.  So I went last Wednesday to weigh-in.  And.... I lost 1.8 pounds. Yeah!!!!!  Then another loss of .6 pounds today.   I have reached a new total weight loss of 12.8 pounds (at Weight Watchers).  It is slow going but I'm happy.

One of the things that has been sticking with me the last few weeks is something my WW leader has said several times.  "I love food more than I hate being fat".  WOW.... The light bulb went on!  I have been mulling that statement over in my head realizing that I do love to eat more that I hate being overweight and out of shape.  The problem is:  How do I change that?  I am so proud and happy when I have success on the scale but that feeling doesn't stay with me very long.  Once I'm home, I start to think about snacks, what I'm going to make for dinner, and what I need from the grocery store.  Our life revolves around food!

One of the ways I'm trying to change that is not to have any junk food in my house.  Just ask my husband and kids.  They often stand in front of the refrigerator or pantry looking for something and complaining that there is nothing to eat.  Actually, there is tons of food in the house, just nothing they want.  I tell them to eat a carrot or banana or have a turkey sandwich.  They want ice cream or pizza or chocolate chip cookies.  I can't have those things in the house.  I'm the one home during the day and I don't want to be tempted.  Last week I made some pumpkin spice muffins for a treat.  They are an old weight watchers recipe.  All you do is take a box of cake mix, I used spice cake mix, and a 15 ounce can of pumpkin puree.  Mix it well and spoon into cupcake tins.  Bake as directed and you have a 3-4 point treat that is delicious.  I tried making it once in a 9 inch square pan but the center turned out soggy so if you try to make this recipe, use the cupcake pans.  I snacked on these when I wanted to have a treat and they were very satisfying.  I'll have to make some more soon because my kids liked them, too.


Also I'm trying to make sure I walk more.  My walking buddy, Ricki, is pushing me to walk hills and do lunges and walk faster.  When the weather is bad, we go to the mall and walk for an hour which makes for a nice change of scenery.  It's nice to have an exercise buddy to motivate and make the time fly by.  Lately, when the weather is good, we have started hiking in the local hills.  I have lived in this area my whole life and never knew there were such beautiful hiking trails near by.  I am really enjoying walking the trails and seeing other people walking and mountain biking in the area.  I noticed that everyone is so friendly.  Everyone we pass says "good morning" and smiles.  It's a great way to start my day.

My goals this week is to continue to add more fruits and vegetables to my diet.  I plan on making veggie soup.  It's so easy... I start by sauteing a large onion, several stocks of celery, two or more garlic cloves in a pan sprayed with olive oil (not Pam, I use a spray bottle you can add your own oil to).  Then add any 0 point veggie such as mushrooms, cabbage, carrots, zucchini, yellow squash, can of diced tomatoes, and anything else you want.  Cover with 100% fat free chicken broth, add seasoning (bay leaf, basil, salt and pepper, etc.) and simmer until all the veggies are tender.  I think it is very satisfying and delicious.  If I feel I have not eaten well during the day or snacked too much in the afternoon I will have a huge bowl of veggie soup for dinner.

I plan to keep doing what I'm doing and keep the number on that scale going in the right direction.  I must persist and not give up.

Thanks for reading.  Peace,
Karen

New Year - New Beginnings

Happy New Year! It was my intent to post a review of last years efforts and successes at the end of December but it never happened.  So in an effort to recap, last year I was down a total of 15 pounds.  Not the results I was hoping for when I started this blog in January, 2012, but I'll take it!  And those 15 pounds will never return... (except the 2.6 I gained during the holidays.... read on).

My Christmas and New Year Holidays were great fun.  My in-laws came to visit us for two weeks and that meant more cooking, drinking and celebrating.  We ate out several times, cooked big meals with fancy desserts and drank a bit of wine (when I say a bit, I mean a many bottles).  My mother-in-law likes to have treats for the kids, and any one else in the house.  She brought homemade truffles with her and boxes of chocolates.  Bought doughnuts and snacks just in case we wanted them and, of course, we all wanted them.  The family left right before New Years but the celebrating wasn't over.  We were invited to our dear friends to ring in the new year.  Food, food and more food!  It was all wonderful and delicious.  My friends are Armenian and prepare a feast for every occasion.  My family and I all love the food they serve and over stuff ourselves because we don't normally eat those dishes.  My husband and son love the beef and chicken and my daughter and I like the boreks - bread with cheese in the middle.  SO GOOD! They served several side dishes and pastries for dessert.  It was all delicious.  

With all the celebrating I found it very difficult to stay focused and keep to my plan of eating healthy over the holidays.  I would have discussions with myself about not eating a piece of chocolate or having a second helping of dinner but I would loose the battle and give in.  The bad habits come back easy.  I still am battling the urge to snack on pretzels and crackers (I love those carbs).  

Last year I had a word-of-the-year.  It was "FOCUS".  And, although, I don't think I focused as well as I could have, I feel having it in the back of my mind was helpful.  This year my word is persistence.  I need to continue with my weight loss efforts and stay on track to continue to decrease that number on the scale.  I need to persist in telling myself that I am worth the effort and worth the time it takes to exercise and go to meetings and cook healthy meals.  I also need to persist at writing this blog.  It has helped me and I know that if I write more often it will help keep me on track.  I have no idea how many people read this.  No one may care.  But the fact that it's out there in cyberspace for anyone to read keeps me motivated to continue.  I don't want anyone to say Karen failed or gave up.  That is my biggest fear. 

I went back to Weight Watchers this week (I didn't go the three weeks before) and gained 2.6 pounds.  I was actually content with that because my scale at home showed an even higher gain just a few days before.  So back to work getting it off and continue the journey to a thinner, healthier me.  It's  going to be a long, long journey.

I love Weight Watchers and attending the meetings.  They started a new program called 360.  It's goal is to not only give you the tools to loose the weight, but to focus on the whole reason for the weight problem.  Addressing your mental and emotional needs as well as the physical.  It's nice to know that other people have similar issues with eating.  Our meeting leader talked about blaming others for our food intake.  I laughed because I do that.  Not directly blame them for putting the food in my mouth but blame the fact that they are part of the problem.  Like when my kids were home for the Christmas Vacation, I didn't walk.  Why?  No reason, really, it was just an excuse.  My husband is doing great on his low-carb diet.  But when I'm not doing well on my diet, I blame the cheese and peanuts that he likes to snack on.  It's not his fault, but it is the cheese and peanut's fault, right?  When they are out on the coffee table, I will indulge in some nuts or pieces of cheese.  What I need to do is move away from the coffee table and go eat some fruit or other low points food.  I have to take control of the situation and not let the situation control me.  (I'm laughing to myself a bit as I typed that last sentence because I know that will take a miracle... sigh...  Persistence).  My goal this week is to work more fruits and veggies into ever meal.  We discussed making soups so I am going to make some this weekend.  I'll let you know how they turned out!

Here's to a happy, healthy, and successful 2013.  

Peace and Love,  and persistence...

Karen

  

Life's Challenges

Wow, what an unsettling last few weeks.  I have been trying to stay focused on my weight loss but life threw me a curve ball.  On October first my daughter started complaining about pain on her right side.  We first thought is was her appendix.  But, having gone through it himself, my husband didn't think the pain was in the right spot. Well, he was right, it turned out she had a cyst on her ovary.  Mind you, she is only 12.  This kind of thing usually doesn't happen in adolescent girls.  We waited a couple weeks to see if the cyst would go away on its own and it did reduce its size (it was 7 cm, which, I was told, was pretty big) but her pain never went away.  So my baby had surgery to clean up the cyst and check the ovary to make sure it wasn't damaged.  All was good, she still has two ovaries.  Whew.  Also, since they were working on the right side, they took out her appendix as a precaution.  Watching my daughter being wheeled into the operating room was the worse moment of my life.  I was surprised by the wave of emotion that took hold of me when she was out of my sight.  I am tearing up as I write this just thinking about it.  My daughter is now recovering very well and returned to school right before Thanksgiving.  A couple more weeks and she will be back to PE class (which she is not excited about) and dance classes.  Life is good again.

Needless to say my weight loss goal hasn't been a priority.  In fact, there were several days were I caught myself stress-eating.  You know, that mindless bingeing on anything that's in the house.  My daughter was doing it, too.  And we talked about it and enjoyed eating comfort foods together.

Thanksgiving came and went and I was very thankful for my mother's delicious cooking.  I did eat whatever I wanted but I planned ahead and made sure I only ate low point foods before the feast.  My husband and I also went for a 30 minute walk around our neighborhood.  During dinner, I realized that the sweet potato casserole my mother makes is a dangerous food for me.  It was right in front of me and I kept taking a little and putting in on my plate.  I completely stuffed myself but I also enjoyed every bite,  including the pumpkin pie my 15 year old son made.  He is taking culinary arts class in high school and likes to show off his new skills.  I would be so proud of him if he became a chef.  He would be great at it.

Now I feel like I can focus again on me.  Even with the holidays fast approaching and my in-laws coming to stay with us for a couple weeks I feel like I have to find a way to be focused and stay on track.  With Weight Watchers, the key to success is tracking every bite.  I often think I can keep track of my points in my head but that is just a lie I tell myself in order to eat what I want.  It's amazing how people lie or justify their actions to themselves.  I do it all the time with food.  I am starting to recognize when I do this and change my thinking.  It's okay to have the snack, I just tell myself to track it.  It helps me realize just how much I eat and I usually end up eating less.

My husband has also jumped on the weight loss band wagon.  He is watching his carbs and doing very well.  In just three weeks he lost 25 pounds!  They just fell off him!!!  In three weeks I went up one pound then down two then up two.  I know, I know, it's easier for men, and I am very proud of him.  He does joke about how I'm mad at him but I'm not.  I think it's great and it is inspiring me to keep with the program and get some exercise.  I even got him to walk with me again Sunday.  He goes faster and I have to work harder to keep up with him, but I get a better work out in that way.  Yeah us!

So, to bring you up to date on my weight loss, I am down 7.8 pounds since I started Weight Watchers and down a total of 11 since I started this blog.  That is not the progress I was hoping for at the beginning of the year when I made my New Years resolution to get healthy.  Wow, as I write this, I am thinking thats not good at all! I'm very disappointed in myself.  I was hoping to have lost 10 pounds by Thanksgiving and I was very close.  I was down 9.6 the week before.  Then last Wednesday, I gained 1.8 to put me at the 7.8 I'm at now.  I was very discouraged.  I really need to get my act together and focus.  Next week will be better.  I can do it.  I can do it.  I can do it.

Peace and love,

Karen

Falling down and getting back up.

I immediately started writing about my second week on the Weight Watchers program but I was suffering a bit of writers block.  So now I will fill you in on my progress:  My second week was fantastic!  I lost 4.6 pounds.  I was ecstatic to say the least!  I walked almost every day and logged just about every bite I ate.  Weight Watchers works.  YaHoo!

Then I started my third week.  I was doing great, right?  I didn't need to log everything.  I know what I'm doing.  I can skip a day walking because I'm not up to it.  Guess what happened at my next weigh in... I don't know because I didn't go to my meeting! Ha Ha...

I knew the scale would show a gain.  Oh, I have plenty of excuses.  My daughter is going though some heath issues (minor, but still nerve wracking for a mother) and she was home from school for several days and has had several doctors appointments and tests.  Also, my in-laws were here for a week and we had dinner parties and went out to eat often and had desserts and wine (and more wine).   The strange thing is, as I was eating out and drinking my wine, I knew I would pay for the indulgent  behavior.  I did try to choose items off the menu that might be the healthiest, but that can only help a little.  It's amazing how you know how to do something good for yourself, yet other parts of your brain don't cooperate.  Like the desire to take a bite of that cheesecake, or eat that piece of bread that you told yourself you didn't even want let alone were going to eat.  The good little angel sitting on my shoulder is speaking to me but I don't listen.  The little devil on the other shoulder is shouting too loud!

I've got to get my act together and get back on track.  I always do well in the morning with my breakfast.  I usually have an egg and a piece of whole wheat toast.  Only four points.  Good for me.  Then, I snack.  Ugh.  I think I just need to get out of the house more.  Being home is bad for dieters.  Always walking past the refrigerator or the pantry.  Hearing the little devil on my shoulder say open the door and see what's inside!  Ha Ha.  Not that there is much in there that is bad for me, but I still look and still want to have a taste.

Well, I am going to keep trying.  And that is important.  I need to keep reminding myself that I need to do this and it's more important to be healthy and feel good about myself than to eat a piece of bread or cupcake or have a cocktail.  It will be a constant battle for me and I need to come to terms with that fact and put on my fighting gloves.

I will go to my meeting this week even though I have to go on a different day due to another doctors appointment for my daughter.  I don't think the scale will show a loss.  But I know I need to go for the support Weight Watchers offers.  Whatever the scale says is not the point this week, getting to that meeting and acknowledging my weight problem is.  Thanks again to my friends and family for encouraging me.  Love you!

Peace,
Karen

IF IT'S GOING TO BE IT'S UP TO ME

I'm back....
I haven't written in a while because I have had no real success to write about.  I am trying to keep this blog positive and productive so when I am not posting, it can only mean one thing... I'm not doing well on my diet - um, I mean change of lifestyle.  The few pounds I lost have crept back somehow and my activity level over the summer was the lowest it has ever been.  I was inspired by another blogger and her post about what she missed about being fat, which was nothing, of course.  I then tried writing a couple times about what it felt like to be overweight, both physically and mentally, but had such a hard time with it I never posted what I wrote.  (I wish I kept track of her blog so I can reference it here because it was really encouraging).  I will try to return to that subject another time.

So turn the page, so to speak.  I am starting fresh again.  Last week I joined Weight Watcher for the third time in my life.  I was very diligent my first week and kept track of everything I ate and all my activities and I did everything I was supposed to do.  I lost a pound and a half..... sigh.  It was not what I had hoped for.  Every time I start a diet, the first week is usually quite impressive!  In general three to five pounds.  The sweet lady that weighed me in said I did great, however.  I thoughtlessly gave her a strange look and she again said it was a great week.  I thought about it while I was sitting in the meeting listening to the very passionate leader talk about putting healthy things in our bodies and realized it was a good week despite what the scale said.  I walked with friends several times and tracked everything I ate.  I started feeling really good about myself for the first time in a very long time.  I felt in control.  That is a spectacular feeling.

So I only lost a pound and a half.  If I loose 1.5 pounds per week I will loose 78 pounds in one year!  That would be impressive.  And maybe even doable - Ha Ha.

If you have ever been to a Weight Watchers meeting you will know that the meeting leader often tells us corny sayings and mantras and encouraging quotes.  I do think they are cliche and often silly.  But this one has stuck with me despite how corny it sounds: "If it's going to be it's up to me".  I have found my self saying in my mind several times and trying hard to believe in myself and my ability to be successful at loosing a lifetime of extra pounds.  Their new points system and their smartphone apps make it very easy and empowering.

I plan to keep this blog more up to date now.  A few friends have been encouraging me to write more and I thank them for their support.  I also plan on reporting a weight loss next week so wish me luck!

Karen

Food is Social

WOW! It's been almost a month since my last post... what does that tell you???  I have been very unmotivated to write anything since the scale has not been my friend lately.  But tonight, while I was out to dinner with my husband and son at Maggiano's, I was talking with our wonderful server who we have become friends with about my blog and dieting and all the woes that go with it.  She inspired me to come home and write.  Thanks Erin!

It seems that all we do is eat.  I don't just mean three meals a day with snacks in between, but everything revolves around food.  Last weekend I attended two events where food was the center of the celebration.  Saturday we went to Santa Anita Racetrack to celebrate a great friend's 40th birthday.  There was also a food truck festival with over 50 gourmet food trucks.  This was my first experience with these wondrous eateries and when we walked in my 14 year old son told me he must be in heaven.  So many selections and I couldn't decide! I wanted to have a taste from every truck.  I knew I could easily overindulge but I only ordered from one truck.  I had the most wonderful grilled cheese with asparagus from the Devilicious truck.  It had goat cheese, brie, caramelized onions and tomato, (I did pass on the bacon which they highly recommend - yeah me).  My daughter was into fries from the The Fry Girl and wanted greek food from George's Greek Truck.  She ordered pita bread and hummus and I, of course, took a taste.  My son ate bacon wrapped hot dogs with chili and chili cheese fries, and had a waffle with ice cream peanut butter and carmel topping - so healthy!  My husband just took bites of everyones food because he couldn't decide.  His ADD kicked in big time and there were just too many choices.  I finally got him tacos with spicy shrimp and orange chicken.  I wish I remembered what truck they were from.  Then there were birthday cupcakes for everyone! Yum.  Well, my point is that there was an abundance of food and even though the ponies were going around the track, people seemed more interested in what they could consume than what was happening during the races.  I left there feeling stuffed and lazy.

The next day we attended a party for a family friend who was retiring.  The event was at the Odyssey Restaurant for their Sunday brunch.  Again, there was heaps of food.  They had sushi and a fish station, fajitas and all the fixings at the Mexican station, fresh made omelets and pastas,  eggs benedict, sausage, bacon, potatoes, carved meats, bagels, cheeses, dessert bar, a chocolate fountain, and more!  The food is good but I realized for me it's about trying a little bit of everything.  I have to make sure I am not missing anything wonderful.  No, I didn't take everything.  I wasn't interesting in any sushi or fish, and pasta didn't sound good.  And I didn't take any meat from the carving station.  But I like the omelet and pastries and different salads.  Again, I left feeling stuffed and lazy.

It seems the only thing we do these days for social interaction is eat.  My family often goes out to dine as a way of doing something together.  I'm trying to make better choices while I'm out to eat.  For example, tonight at Maggiano's I just had their sausage orzo soup.  I don't know what kind of calories it has but it had to be better than a bowl of pasta.  What's more, I didn't have a bite of dessert.  I was very proud of myself because they have the most wonderful cheesecake.  My husband ordered a slice but I let him and  and my son polish it off.  Oh yeah, the bread! Yikes, I forgot I ate several pieces of bread dipped in olive oil and balsamic vinegar.  I guess I didn't do as well as I thought.  Focus, Karen, Focus.....

I know I'm not the only one who thinks of food as a social event.  My mother has always had way too much food at any family gathering.  She would not have thought of herself as a good hostess if we ran out of anything.  And whenever we get together with friends for a night of cards the food comes first and is dessert is extravagant and decadent.  

I know I have to make better choices when going out and socializing with family and friends.  Bad habits are hard to break.  But breaking bread with friends is so much fun!

Peace,
Karen